Here are the Baisden Live updates that caught my attention and launched me into deep retrospection:
· Do you have more or less friends than you had three to five years ago? And does it become more difficult to make friends as you get older?
· Would you agree the title “friend” is given to people who don’t deserve it?
· Finish the sentence: Real friends don’t…
Gut-shaking laughter emanated from me as I read his fans’ comments regarding the posts. I soon found myself evaluating my own relationships and I was quite tickled by my discoveries. To be honest, I definitely have more friends than I had three to five years ago. Because my life has changed so dramatically in the last five years, I have come into contact with others walking in my shoes. Just the sheer craziness of our various situations sparks camaraderie…because no one can go throw this ish alone. It would drive them crazy. And I really can’t manage more than three personalities I already have.
I mean come on…all of my parental units became chronically ill resulting in the death of the fatherly figures and the disablement of the mommies. What was once thought to be a simple case of teenage rebellion actually was diagnosed as a bipolar condition with post-traumatic shock syndrome and difficulty controlling impulses. I witnessed that same child steal a car (good thing it was mine), attempt suicide, fly into uncontrollable rages and then give birth to a healthy baby boy. And during all of that we managed to survive foreclosure, bank repossession and unforeseen unemployment. Whew…if I didn’t know any better, I’d swear I’ve been trapped in Tyler Perry’s next play production! Anyone going through all of that drama definitely needs all of the friends she can get! LOL!
While I agree the term “friend” can be given too freely, that just hasn’t been my case. Those who occupy that role in my life have truly gone way past the call of duty. They have held me… consoled me… pray for and with me…shook me…. slapped me… kicked me…pulled me… and cheered for me. Whatever action was needed at that given time, I didn’t have to ask. They just knew what to do. The things they have done may not have always been pleasant, but they were needed.
So if I had to complete that sentence, I would say REAL FRIENDS don’t abandon you. They just don’t! They have no problem playing the role you need them to play. In fact, you won’t need to ask them… they will just do it.
So as I look back over my life, I know I have way more friends now as a hot g-mama than I had as a young “know-it-all” diva! The evolution of my life just made it that way. The evolution of my persona made it that way.
My friends don’t all run in the same circles…which is okay. That keeps my life full. Plus it keeps me from wearing them out. LOL!
And it keeps them sincere in their reasons for being my friend. See, they are my friends because they value me. And I was able to attract them because I valued myself. And because I finally learned to value myself…I was able to trust myself with other, be more comfortable in different environments and truly be a friend in all of my life roles.